My weight loss journey was about so much more that just dropping the pounds. The nuts and bolts of weight loss for me were definitively changing my eating habits and exercise and those required a physical commitment. My lasting success in my weight-loss journey absolutely involved powerful emotional breakthroughs.
My first step was to develop a healthier attitude towards by body, my weight and food. This was not easy for me to do and was definitely a process. A huge challenge for me was the fact that food is a major element in every social gathering. I was used to celebrating with food, fighting stress with food, and even mourned with food. So, where did that leave me? I realized I had an emotional dependence on the wrong kind of foods and I ate to help cope with many things in my life. I also had a very negative image of my body and still struggle with this. I have lost 95 pounds and still imagine myself as an overweight person. I had made a physical commitment to finding a healthier me and had started to see results. This time I was not going to give up. I had to think long-term. This journey for me was going to be ongoing and was not going to have an end. I was okay with that.
My first step was to develop a healthier attitude towards by body, my weight and food. This was not easy for me to do and was definitely a process. A huge challenge for me was the fact that food is a major element in every social gathering. I was used to celebrating with food, fighting stress with food, and even mourned with food. So, where did that leave me? I realized I had an emotional dependence on the wrong kind of foods and I ate to help cope with many things in my life. I also had a very negative image of my body and still struggle with this. I have lost 95 pounds and still imagine myself as an overweight person. I had made a physical commitment to finding a healthier me and had started to see results. This time I was not going to give up. I had to think long-term. This journey for me was going to be ongoing and was not going to have an end. I was okay with that.
I had decided to commit myself to learn what changes were necessary to be successful long-term. It was really amazing what a simple change a mindset can do. I had to change my thought process towards my journey. I also had to understand that everyone's journey was their own and my relationship to food is my own. What was my emotional attachment to food? I now needed to see food as a tool to find a healthier me for my lifetime. When I get stressed I call a friend, exercise, write in my journal rather than eat and stuff my emotions down farther and pretend that everything was just fine.
Another huge struggle I was having was a fear of being myself. I tended to be a person who prentended everything was perfect, had it all together, was flawless and who I thought everyone else wanted me to be. This was so very unrealistic but what if people didn't like who I really was? What if I was just myself and no-one liked me for me? I finally realized I was being dishonest with myself and everyone else. I decided I needed to be myself and who I really am and if people didn't like me for me that was not about me. I do have flaws and no-one is perfect in this world. I wanted to be a genuine person. I also did not care about myself very much at all. I always put everyone else first and let myself and my marriage fall to the wayside. I was such a people-pleaser that it became extremely harmful and toxic in my life. I realized that life in many aspects is a work in progress.
Living my life as myself flawed and all was quite an adjustment for me but I feel like I have taken a mask off. A mask I had worn for years and it felt good. A huge weight had been lifted off of my shoulders (pun intended).
In more ways than one I was now motivated to make lasting healthier changes in my life. The challenges I faced were absolutely worth it. I still struggle but feel very successful and now have the tools to stay motivated. The emotional component was the biggest piece of the weight-loss puzzle for me but also the motivator for me.
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